Wednesday, March 10, 2010

What is Arranged-Love Marriage?

In India, in general if you are a girl between 20-25yrs with a college degree,then it is the ripe age to get married,or in case, you are modern (making use of your college degree, I mean earning) then you can buy more time. Similarly for guys, but they have to have some job along with above things.
Traditionally, before any marriage,the parents from both sides would inquire about each other's families through middle man and then sign the deal. There would be very little scope for the guy and the gal to know about each other. That's what is called arranged marriage. You know about your partner after you are married. I know many successful marriages happened this way.
But now at 24, it's my turn, I didn't realize it untill one of my friends got her Mr. Right though a Indian matrimonial websites. I was aware of such sites before, but I never showed interest in understanding their work until a close friend of mine found her finance.
Usually, it would be appalling to some of you, who believe in love or love at first sight. But thinking logically, I found that the probability of finding your love in the young section, between 20yrs -29yrs, of 3billion women population is very bleak. For an open minded Indian (that the term if you are peso-modern/educated)to find a his/her match in his/her caste becomes next to impossible.I came up with a number,200, that the number of girls I interacted in my life who were of same age as I was. Assume 10,000 gals to be the sample space of my true love, the p=.02 which also means that I need to get in touch with rest 9800 women before I turn 30.
It is not about defending or refuting anything about arranged marriage or love marriage but trying to understand how to make the best decision which may not be the right decision.
One of the things I found is that some open-minded parents are giving some space to their children in deciding their life partners. Based on the above calculated probability, it is very difficult for an average Indian guy to find a date in a country where 'SEX' is a taboo(I am not taking about you, who has girlfriend/boyfriend). Some may disagree with it but there is a general mentality in Indian males that a girlfriend can not be a wife.

The new concept is now ARRANGE LOVE. Parents, who have already made a decision on the girl,introduce their son to her in informal ways that neither the gal nor the boy knows about the plan. They interact for some time (months or years) and once they become comfortable with each other, the talk of marriage pops up on the dinner table.
The guy, who is more comfortable with someone he knows, has more probability of choosing her than the unknown ones.

So, this is how arranged love marriage works.

Why? Because we are a developing nation and we are also developing our culture.

1 comment:

  1. Marriage in India has a different definition than rest of the cultures!

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